Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Definitely, Maybe

It is a beautiful night here in the MR. Well, more like beautiful morning but you catch my drift. I haven't posted in a bit so I thought I would let you know how my life is going.

Quite boring actually. I am getting nightmares of black and pinto beans chasing me down in my sleep and being baracaded by massive tortillas. A.K.A. Taco del Mar is consuming me alive.

I realized while sitting here that I haven't been doing much with my summer besides waking up at noon, watching consecutive hours of televison about fat people and shows involving people addicted to drugs and who have OCD. I decided it was high time to finish my Pullman Summer 2010 Bucket List.

I thought I would share my list with my followers and cross them off each time I complete a goal, followed by story behind it. Possibly a picture, but that might be a little too intimate. Especially goal #1.

Pullman Summer 2010 Bucket List: To be completed by August 15th

1. Have a Threesome
2. Learn how to Beatbox and Breakdance (could be challenging considering I have no upper body strength)
3. Kill a Thirty Bomb (aka Fourth of July MR Declaration of Independence to Busch Lite Challenge)
4. Have sex on the roof
5. Make new friends
6. Lose twenty pounds
7. Smoke on the roof of the library - only if it is with MPatt
8. Go to a strip club
9. Go Streaking (maybe after losing that twenty pounds)
10. Get something pierced or tatted
11. Create a summer photo collage
12. Read a damn good book
13. Redecorate room
14. Finish the upstairs of MR (will be quite challenging considering Hurricane Katrina came through)
15. Weed wack the entire house
16. Make The Palouse Hills the most read blog on campus - YES
17. Write a song
18. Have at least one BBQ a week
19. Go on a hiking adventure
20. Road trip somewhere random
21. Finish paddles
22. Go shooting
23. Spend the entire day and night at the cliffs (have spent the night, but not entire day, planning on a 24 hour excursion)
24. Attempt to get a discount on groceries by flirting obnoxiously with the homely checkout boy at Winco
25. Go to a concert
26. Hotsprings!
27. Reconnect with an old friend
28. Watch the sunrise
29. Go fishing, then proceed to cook the fish immediately following
30. Learn to swim
31. Jump the cliffs (after learning to swim of course)
32. Watch the meteor shower – August 12, 2010 @ 10:30PM
33. Create a project with bottle caps
34. Find the one song that will describe Pullman Summer 2010
35. Tag something (gotta leave my mark somewhere in the world)
36. Go to a Farmers Market
37. Watch all three of the Godfather movies back to back
38. Have a drum circle in the middle of a field
39. Make a list of goals for the school year
40. Moulin Rouge vs. Food (enough said)

I recently achieved #23 (go shooting) while at the cliffs for a late night dance party. I met a guy who took me back to his campsite and then proceeded to allow me to shoot his 22 caliber rifle (i believe that is what it was called) while we waited for his homemade tent sauna to warm up. Quite ingenius I thought. Although I began to realize that shooting guns in James Bond's "Goldeneye" has nothing to do when holding a real life loaded gun. No high score there.

Whoops.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Lezzies and Justin Bieber

Okay so we haven't written in a minute, but I personally have been studying for a huge test and everyone else has gone off on adventures. This weekend one of us is climbing rocks in the woods, 3 of us are visiting home in the west, 1 of us works with grass, another with beans, one of us is being caged, and one of us is in the land of the potatoes. Who am I forgetting? Oh and the phantom is somewhere doing phantom like activities.

So a reasonable amount of you may be aware about the website concerning ladies who look like Bieber. That sucks for him I guess. I'm sure there are straight people who look like Bieber too.

Now for more important information. On July 4th, in honor of our Declaration of Indepedence, several members of the MR will be participating in a 30 bomb challenge. 24 hours of bliss. We will let everyone know who the lucky champions of the fermentation process are. My bet goes to Tron.

A random problem of the day. Why are there people out there who look presentable at 8 AM? It's shocking. Hello, my name is Blah and I had time to curl my hair this morning and pick something out to wear AND I'm only 21?! Who are these people? My guess is that they're aliens very similar to our own alien, who has indeed been seen looking presentable in the early morning. tisk tisk. It's a blessing if I make it out of the house at 8:40 with everything I need and appropriate shoes on. So note to all, try to dress tolerably dull so I don't feel like a troll in the morning!

Okay here's a Lil List for you All:

Wonderful Things I Love that I would never admit on a 1st Date:
1. The Smell of Bleach
2. Harry Potter, Harry Potter, Harry Potter! I love HP!!!!!!!!
3. Twilight: The fastest read in the world. I've never felt so smart
4. Skype: But only with my besty MK
5. Personalized Nike High Tops
6. Cat House: The HBO reality show featuring legal prostitutes in Nevada
7. Patt: Obviously.
8. The Huskies. I can't explain this. But I secretly think they're swell. Just not as good as my distinguished university

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Shattered Windows and Dignity

Good Afternoon!

I can finally see straight after a night of chaos.

We started the day off with chugging flasks of cheap vodka in the CUB bathroom, classy I know. But what can you when everyone is 21? It's hard out there for us twenty year olds.

After Dupus when everyone was good and toasted by five, people kind of split up. Some went to a bbq and the older kids stayed at the bar. Typical.

PARTY TIME BEGINS!! What a night what a night. From what I remember (which is not that much) there were quite a lot of people here. It was chaotic. Soo much booze was consumed, I can't even recall half of it. We served jiggle juice tie dye style, it was quite colorful. The morning after it looks like someone puked and pissed in it. After last night, anything could've happened.

Apparently there was a shirtless man in some sort of skirt, I am upset that I was not alive at the time of this occurence. I remember there was lots of screaming and Panda attempting to regulate. Did not happen.

Around 1130 the cops showed up and miraculously Wrap talked to them. Somehow we only ended up with a noise complaint. The gods must have been watching over us. When I saw the cops, I booked it into my room and brought around 10 people with me. Good times.

Unfortunately, alcohol kicked my ass and sent me to the curb. I then proceeded to run around in my underwear which happened to be inside out. The only way to wear them these days.

Now I have to get ready for work, and then who knows what. It's Saturday night! Crap.

Infinite x's and o's,

Tron

Wrappin w/ the cops

oh friday night at the MR the palouse gets wild with summer schoool finnally comming to an end we celebrate by crackin bottles at 2pm and taking in the bathroom of public places. what could be better. woodstock 2010 was to much of a success that ended up with cops, man withouth pants, and other things that not so PG13. I cannot exlplain the amount of black out juice that consumed during the party, oh shout out to sista Duc for being a champ and being the drunkest lil ginge i know. Speaking of

Top 5 Drunkest at Woodstock 2010 from my perspective:

1. Tron
2. Kavorka
3. Duc
4. Salamander
5. and a tie between PC and Patt.

But I'm getting a little but ahead of myself, we havn't discuseed what happend before, after a pound and a half of fries that were consumed with a bit o burnettes to top it off the night started off well. Old balls in the house started the 44 tap out and since tron Pc and I are not about to be that for some time were starting our town type of tap out. more about that later.

P.s don't drink the Yetti
MR

Super Blog SATURDAY

This is the beginning of Super Blog Saturday. We will all be recounting events and adventures from the previous night. This is Woodstock in PCP point of view:

So the night began at Dupus Boomers where Wrap and myself enjoyed food and bathroom break shots of burnetts and the 21+ kids again worked their way through the 44 beer tap out challenge. M.Patt is obviously in the lead much the the dismay of Panda.

Then Reynolds (Wrap) and myself went home to get ready, have a few beers, and await party time. We then decided to go to a friend's bbq on Maple. This house had a sauna. So therefore, I need to find a way to become best friends with the residents. On the way we found a small drunk ranga aka my big sis Duc. She spread her fiery love and came along to the bbq. Beautiful. She def made a small semi-awk sauce gathering a ton of entertainment for Reynolds and myself.

PARTY TIME! Woot. The drink of choice was jiggle juice, which is jello shots in sprite tricking you into thinking you aren't getting wasted. It tricked me at least. A majority of the night is pretty fuzzy but here are a few highlights:
- Tron on the ground while Duc humps the crap out of her
- Duc calling someone named Eduardo, Allejandro because she loves Gaga
- Kavorka goes to the bars!
- A man dressed in a skirt with peace signs and wearing no shirt
- The police coming, 19 y/o Wrap talking to them while wasted, and us only getting a warning
- Me telling someone that cleaning won't make someone hook up with them while blacked out
- Widmer Hefeweizen

Anyways, that is all. I almost died at Denny's today due to alcohol poisoning. But now I'm alive and dreaming of Jim Caviezal or however you spell his name. But not as Jesus, only as Edmond in The Count of Monte Cristo or in frequency

Friday, June 18, 2010

Booze, Hippies, and Tap Outs, Oh My!

Good day fellow bloggas.

This is the Tron speaking. In approximately t-minus 1 hour and fifty two minutes, we will be having a legendary party. Not just any party. Woodstock.

The majority of us are already plastered, aka stupid twenty one year olds and their tap outs.

We are not sure how many people will be attending this palooza of fun, but it is expected to be a lot. I will be reporting back on Saturday morning if I can still see straight.

I am only writing this post because I was forced to by PC.

On that note, toodaloo and wish the MR luck in their endeavours and shenanigans.

Sincerely,

Tron


P.S. Apparently Burnettes has multiple types of flavors including blue raspberry and pink lemonade.
There is a god.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Chunks of Vodka in My Fridge

So for future reference, I would like to introduce members of the MR and all co-authors of The Palouse Hills. They all attend a super prestigious university and are boosting busche and burnett's stock market day by day. Although I believe that we've been mixing it up in honor of Dupus' 44 beer tap out. So members are as follows:

- Kovorka: A hippie who enjoys the great outdoors, climbing walls, and men with greasy hair and small pants
- Panda: My personal Momma. Always take her advice concerning chicken's readiness on the skillet. She doesn't believe in remembering encounters at Mike's she does believe in looking beautiful while blacked
- Tron aka Gabatron: She likes to wear leggings, comfy slippers, and short shirts. She can drink like a champion and is so pure of heart that everyone loves her on first sight. Especially kappas?
- Duc: Best big sis in the universe. Keeping the ginger dream alive. Responsible to the core until you get some tequila in her. No Jose por favor. This lady is classy
- Salamander: Our missing roommate full of class and poise. She apparently likes to take a bite out of people late night but most of the time she's my brother's big sis and a little blonde ray of light
- Wrap: Reynolds Wrap. haha. Panda came up with that one. Or maybe she should be the hair in tribute to her flowing mane. But that movie is scary so maybe not. Summer roomie or not, she'll always have a special place in the casa and all of our heart's
- Patt: This lady likes to spend her days planting grass which she is allergic to. She is amazing and she brightens up every room. And she always has the most enjoyable night showers
- PCP: I'm writing this post so it's awk sauce to write about yourself. I'm a known fellon and I cower in fear over Panda's beauty
- JJ: MISSING! Have you seen this girl? Description: Small, adorable, and quiet like a cat
- The Alien: She lives in the outdoors. Nough said
- The Phantom: She pays rent but you'd need a nanny cam to spot her short, infrequent visits. She was blessed By Baby J

I just need somebody to love

Bieber fever. Jesus I wish that kid were 18. 2 more years, eh?
In all honesty, Nigel on SYTYCD is an awful judge, ain't nothing wrong with Green!


I wonder who Gabby will ask to eat out this weekend... that post will be Saturday.

on a final note. do people in Hollywood land know that botox doesn't makes them look 'good'? I think they've all lost neurons in their brain if they think for one second they look good. Cough, Cough Tori Spelling.

TaTa until 44 tap out.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Tyra Foams and Little People read Harry Potter

So things worth mentioning about the Daily Grind and wonderful events. From this moment on, Saturdays will be super blog days so look forward to that. Additional Info:

- Tyra Banks likes to foam at the mouth and bark like a dog during interviews on her so modestly named talk show "Tyra." I don't know what this means, but I'm pretty sure it means I need to DVR Tyra.

- It is inappropriate to enter a conference room full of people who know each other if you are unaffiliated. This means you little lady reading Harry Potter and staring in a glamour mirror of some sort

- Also, WOODSTOCK

The Daily Grind Special.

We are collaborating in the conference room, here in the palouse. Was a swell time till we were infiltrated by outsiders. consequently this post must be short.
Till next time MR.

p.s no service in the conference room.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

You are Huge!

Several Notes:

1. There is a new show on ABC Family called You are Huge premiering in the end of June. We are anxiously awaiting this show chronicling everything we live for in life.

2. Megan Patt has lost some property. Please return it dust bunnies in the cubbie

3. WOODSTOCK! Happy 21st Bday our little pukey wonder

4. Tron's vagina has a slight itch

5. Fuck Ryan Cabrera's semen infested afro

6. We are fully aware that we are the crazy drunk bitches at the party.

7. Gucci. Do you speak italian?

8. No one should ever give Tron the remote, because you will end up watching Hair or Last House on the Left where some very unseemly things are done with a microwave and someone's head. Not okay